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I accidentally sat down on my poor little niece on Sunday!
She’d been sitting next to me when I stood up for some-reason-or-other. Stealthily, she moved over to where I was sitting without saying a thing! Then I went to sit back down without looking behind me…
Tears!
When you’re two years and eight months old, having your thirty-seven year old aunty sit down on you – even if it’s only for seconds – is quite the shock, I’d imagine.
She wasn’t injured. But those beautiful long and dark brown lashes drowned in the backwash of her tears, and her deep dark chocolate puddle eyes were entombed in a layer of moisture.
So I picked her up and gave her many hugs and kisses. Told her how very sorry I was. Checked she was okay. Still, she cried.
Then I asked her what I could do to make things better, suggesting a game of chasey around the house (she loves chasing/being chased).
Immediately the tears dried up and she shouted “Yes!!!”.
So we played chasey. Several times. And there were tickles. More cuddles and kisses. Laughter.
And it was over. Forgotten.
Sometimes I wish that as fully grown humans, we could retain the ability to move on just like that… to just drop our shit and get on with life.
Wouldn’t that be nice?
Seems to me, that’s kinda part of what yoga is about. Or something like that.
~Svasti
Svasti: A Journey From Assault To Wholeness 
I think that kids can move on because they get to cry. And the “Auntie” or whoever asks them what would make it better. In real life, we get upset, don’t tell anyone, don’t have anyone ask us if there’s a way to fix it…and so on. We hang on to because it becomes us…our identity is our unmet needs.
Kids are so resilient aren’t they? I think there is something to the fact that they pretty freely express their emotions… . I wonder how much happier adults would be if we would just feel the feelings instead of stuffing, denying and hiding them.
Your neice sounds very cute!
You forgot to mention the most important thing to do when you drop what you’re doing and get on with life: . . . play chasey! or some other “childlike” activity that reminds us of the joy and fun we had years ago, and how we can tap that same child inside when we need to (or simply want to!)
Saw you got PTSD. So do I. Hope the flashbacks are not too bad.
Have fun and thanks for sharing.
michael j
It could be that over time we build up a huge bank of unresolved stuff from childhood on — I see how some people tell their children not to cry when they are clearly upset, and so begins the repression. Best to get everything out at the time (but not always so easy).
Such a sweet story Svasti, and so well told 🙂 Yes, how much better the world would be if we could all adapt the ease of letting go and transitioning into the next moment without carrying the past ones with us…
Very wise words Svasti. The odd thing is that a problem will colour my life and keep me awake,,,,until another one comes along and then the first one is forgotten.
When I’m happy…that’s when problems crowd in and sit on me. They know you see that I’m afraid to be happy…so they help me by sitting down very hard.
You are so right
love
henry
Just seeing the title to this post helped me. I kept repeating “moving on” to myself in reference to all the ugliness that has happened lately.
I find it easier to drop my shit while on the mat. It seems easier to give myself permission to let go in the studio.
I am ready to move on. Leave my shit behind and pack up to a new location with quieter streets, happier neighbors and hell, I’ll even take some white picket fences, organic tomatoes and fresh spinach. Yumm-meee
In America we’re about to give thanks, a day of turkey eating, trimmings and all that yadda yadda. I am thankful for YOU Svasti. You are a soul sister from down under and I thank God for you!
Yes, I agree! We have so much to learn from kids, and yes, Yoga is definitely a way for us to bring back the more desirable aspects of being a kid.
Bob Weisenberg
http://YogaDemystified.com
@RB – Oooh, I sincerely hope that’s not all we are, “…our identity is our unmet needs…”. It’s probably true in some ways. But I’d like to think that the path of yoga is about tearing down those delusions, and seeing our unmet needs for what they really are.
@Jennifer – My niece is *ultra* cute. I forgot to mention her dark brown super-curly hair (there will doubtless be hair straighteners in her future!). If only society supported humans to be upset when we need to be, instead of being told to “grow up”. Which seems to be short-hand for telling us to keep our hysterical emotions to ourselves!
@contoveros – Wouldn’t it be great if all our problems could be solved the way they used to be, just like that? Playing chasey, sharing chocolate biscuits, or doing some cartwheels.
Luckily, my PTSD is (possibly) almost completely gone. Well, I don’t know yet if “gone” is the correct word. But if nothing else, its in remission. And seems to be staying there. Wishing you healing with your own PTSD. 🙂
@Jennifer – I agree, we do learn to repress. Good grief, that’s been one of the major stumbling blocks for me in my own journey of healing! And I know I’m far from alone there.
@Karin – That’s what I aim for, sometimes anyway. When I can. Its not easy though. At least, it isn’t right now. Ask me again in five years time. I wonder about this “not letting go” and the anger most of us live with. They are definitely connected. The rage we often feel when disagreeing with someone comes from this place, I think.
@soulMerlin – Sounds like you need someone to play chasey with! 😉
@Christa – Yeah… the title kinda came from nowhere, as they often do. And it seemed right. Thank you for your lovely words. I hope you enjoy your Thanksgiving and that you move with love in your heart. It’s time, I think!
@Bob – I’ve never had more fun than when practicing all the asana I’ve been doing this year. And in class, with others, absolutely belly laughing as we find ourselves becoming more accomplished in our practice. 🙂
Your blog reminded me of this that I wrote on my website:
“The great gurus of Yoga and other Eastern traditions achieve inner peace and experience the ultimate joy in life by cultivating the boundless wonder of a child. For them every moment is the occasion for innocent amazement, even in the middle of the most trying circumstances. They still experience all the ordinary pain and difficulty of being human. They just process it differently.”
Bob Weisenberg
http://YogaDemytified.com
@Bob – Absolutely, I’ve heard that kind of quote before. And I agree. 🙂
LOL “Chasey”. It is lovely just how quickly children can let go of hurt. I once dropped Mariaske when she was a year old (in fact it was on her birthday of all days). She landed face down flat onto the wooden floor from about 120cm up and really bashed her chin and bit her lip. I was mortified, it was the first time I had EVER mishandled a child but she sat up and with blood pouring from her lips she sat up and burst out laughing, it was a bizarre response. She all but forgot the experience a minute later but its stuck with me rather vividly !
@Judith – That is quite amazing! Bless their sweet little hearts. I’m so excited that your new little one is nearly here. I can’t wait to hear the news!
Last time I tried to play “chasey” with someone, she took out a restraining order.
Things just don’t seem to work like they used to 😦
😉
@RealJIMMY – Never mind, dear. We’ll play chasey with you and if we need to we’ll do our own restraining 😉