
Thanks, Yoga Dawg!! š
Iāve been thinking this one through and I wanted to break down my outrage for yāall a little more re: the Tara Stiles saga.
Iām much calmer now. Not so much with the angry. But still, this latest “yoga scandal” resonates with me in a way that none of the other recent issues have (e.g. see Toe Sox-Gate), and Iām gonna explain why. In detail. So bear with me, okay?
To kick things off: Tara Stiles has called her book and presumably āherā yoga āSlim Calm Sexy Yogaā. She promotes it as such and clearly believes in this message. However for me, this is very problematic.
The title itself is disingenuous.
What I mean by that is this: if you do enough yoga or ANY other kind of exercise, you will lose weight as a by-product. And for that you donāt need to buy the āSlim Calm Sexy Yogaā book. Whether 15 minutes a day of yoga is enough to deliver the sort of results Tara is claiming… well, thatās debatable.
As for āSlimā? Really? There are people in this world ā people like me ā who, even at their thinnest, could NEVER be described as thin. I might look in shape, toned and slim for my build (think tall Amazonian proportions, broad shoulders, busty, curvy), but no one would call me slim when thereās a world of underfed actresses and models to be compared to.
Calm, eh? Hmmm. Yesss… a little meditation and regular old yoga will help you with the calm factor. So will getting enough sleep.
And Sexy? So erm… is sexiness implied in relation to Slim? Are you only Sexy if youāre Slim and Calm? Can you possibly be Sexy and neither Slim or Calm?
And thatās just for starters.
Honestly, I donāt really care if Tara has āsensibleā You Tube videos or other āhelpfulā tips in her book, as has been pointed out by other bloggers. And I donāt buy the āpoor Tara, sheās just a victim of the marketing machine selling her book, itās not her faultā excuse, either.
Surely, if she truly objected to the way it was going to be marketed, sheād pull out of the deal and/or find another publisher? I know I would!
And letās not forget her āFry your fat on the matā segment which directly supports those advertising messages! I donāt mean to be snooty, but Iād like to point out that in that TV spot she was holding standard yoga poses for only a minute or two and calling them āfat burningā exercises. On live TV being broadcast to millions of viewers.
In direct contrast, a male yoga teacher friend of mine talks about asana in terms of their healing benefits. Yep, HEALING.
And hey, letās not forget that Yin Yoga (which I havenāt practiced, but Linda teaches) involves holding asana for MUCH longer than a minute (with ZERO mentions of fat burning!).
Guess what Iām saying is that certain attributes have been assigned to Taraās yoga style and the benefits promised are actually true for doing ANY kind of yoga. But generally, those things are considered by-products of the practice, and not the end-goal.
So, already thereās a major disconnect happening here for me.
But donāt get me wrong: I think itās perfectly fine to want to lose weight (healthily, I might add). If thatās what you think you need. And in some cases for reasons to do with health and longevity, weight loss is desirable. But not to make you better, calmer or sexier.
Of course, this is the common mythology of our society and it begins the moment young girls are given their first Barbie and Ken dolls: thinner (for girls)/more muscular (for guys) = Better.
BUT THIS IS NOT YOGA.
And in my humble opinion, it is NOT okay for yoga teachers to reinforce the message that you arenāt okay the way you are. Youāre fat. You need to do MY yoga in order to lose weight. Fry your fat! Buy my book!!
(My Guru refers to marketing as modern-day sorcery because of its ability to manipulate people to do what you want them to do.)
This kind of marketing message is anti EVERYTHING that yoga stands for, and itās one of the few things that Iād describe as āun-yogicā ā a word that in general I detest and think is used as a slur/insult to judge others (and therefore is in itself, un-yogic. Doh!). But thatās a whole other post!
The very branding of yoga as āSlim Calm Sexyā with skimpily-clad images of Tara infers: āBe like me/look like meā.
It doesnāt even matter if she never says that explicitly ā the message is there like a blinking neon light because itās tapping directly into all of the pre-existing ālose 100lbs and get a lifeā late-night infomercials that have been playing adĀ nauseaĀ in our collective unconscious for far too many years.
Now, hereās a cold hard fact: depending on your metabolism/doshas, genes, physical build and bone structure, you might NEVER look like Tara. Ever.
Then… what happens when those 15 minutes of āfat burningā yoga a day DONāT get rid of oneās bra fat (Iām assuming this refers to the little roll that forms under the back of the bra)? Because letās face it ā this is NOT going to be enough for some people at all.
Note: Thereās no one-size-fits-all yoga routine thatās guaranteed to make a person lose weight!
==Also, as Nadine has rightly pointed out in the comments, there’s nothing wrong with bra fat anyway==
So, if someone doesnāt get the result they expect, what will it mean about their impression of yoga and more importantly, their relationship to themselves? Has yoga, then, just added another nail in the coffin of someoneās self-esteem instead of offering them a powerful means of liberation from such things?
This sort of thinking in Taraās book and marketing in general is symptomatic of the āIāll be happy when…ā disease. When Iām richer, thinner, better looking, when Iāve had that nose/boob job, got a better job, a lover, children and so on… THEN Iāll be happy.
Of course, āIāll be happy when…ā is a lie.
And the cure to this malaise is NEVER more improvements or possessions. I mean, we know this, right? Because when we do get what we want, weāre still not as happy as we thought weād be, right? Like a hamster on its wheel, we keep spinning on the spot thinking weāre getting somewhere but in fact, weāre digging ourselves a deeper and deeper hole.
The ONLY way out of the hamster wheel is to fully buy into Radical Self-Acceptance: that everything about you is perfect just the way you are… thereās no need to keep running, and searching. Everything you want and need is already right here, and youāve just got to learn to see it.
Right now, some of you might be thinking: OMG, that sounds like a huge pile of horse dung, right?
How could I possibly be okay if I donāt have movie star looks and/or a model shaped body? How can I like or love myself if Iām not this generalised western concept of everything that’s acceptably attractive, fun and social? If I donāt have the right clothes, a house, a car, a family, lots of friends. HOW COULD ANY OF THAT BE OKAY?!!
Well, because who you are is not limited to your appearance, clothes, your job, how you live, your friends, hobbies and habits. None of those things!
And because if you like, you can choose to start exploring what else you might be. What other wondrous possibilities might be associated with being a human being in this inter-connected interplay of the universe!
And this, my friends, is what yoga is all about.
Because yoga is, amongst other things, Radical Self-Acceptance, Unreasonable Joy (i.e. joy without reason or cause), Heart-Chakra Opening, generating Love and Compassion, and the tradition of Living Liberation (jiva mukti)…
WHAT??! You thought yoga was just about stretching or frying your fat or getting a toned butt? Erm, sorry. Thatās. Just. Not. True.
Thereās much more to come! And here’sĀ part 2..
~Svasti
P.S. Hereās a few related posts on the subject in no particular order. I donāt necessarily agree with every post, but feel free to make up your own mind!
From Nadine: The making of a yoga body
From The BlissChick: DO NOT BUY THIS BOOK
From EcoYogini: Selling Yoga: The Trends that Define our Culture
From Curvy Yoga:Ā Yoga, weight loss, and transformation
From Brooks Hall: Slim Sexy Savvy and Yoga-sex
From Linda-Sama #1: Words almost fail me
From Linda-Sama #2:Ā Seva is sexy
From Linda-Sama #3:Ā Burn your blubber, fry your fat
From Linda-Sama #4:Ā Upon further reflection of yoga noise
From Yoga Dawg: The New Epidemic: Bra Fat
From Yoga Dork: Tara Stiles Launches āSlim, Calm, Sexyā Yoga to Acclaim, Insult, Revolt (see marketing)
From It’s All Yoga, Baby: Toesoxnudegate: the feminists &Ā KathrynĀ Budig speak up
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