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Svasti: A Journey From Assault To Wholeness

~ Recovery from PTSD & depression + yoga, silliness & poetry…

Svasti: A Journey From Assault To Wholeness

Tag Archives: gluten

Two Words Project: 2012 summary

04 Monday Feb 2013

Posted by Svasti in Two Words Project

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Acceptance, empathic, gluten, Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, Healing, healthy boundaries, highly sensitive person, I Quit Sugar, Metagenics detox, self-acceptance, self-love, two words project

As previously mentioned, 2012 was a ker-racker of a year for me. In part, this is thanks to the wonderful Two Words Project.

I’m not entirely sure how it works, but mindfully choosing two words for your year’s intentions is a VERY powerful activity. It seemingly sets a very clear agenda of possibility… the kind of possibility that makes your toes tingle (and not because you’re wearing too-tight shoes).

Those Two Words, once liberated from your subconscious mind (or wherever they reside), become alive. They resonate in your body and mind, working on your behalf even when you don’t think you’re paying attention.

Which is quite handy really.

Most of my Two Words-related changes have been subtle and were probably invisible to others. Slow changes, the way Sarah Wilson describes them with her Titanic Theory.

The changes are primarily in the way my thoughts have presented themselves to me, in light of my two words for 2012: Healing and Acceptance.

Healing

Well… [pun unintended!].

I’m not exaggerating when I say that in 2012 I spent an all-mighty small fortune on my health. I definitely exceeded the minimum spend on health-related stuff that gets you a tax break (hooray?). I know, coz it’s all typed up neatly in an Excel spreadsheet.

Coz here’s what I did: I made healing myself my #1 priority and did whatever it took in order to make it happen.

Mostly this meant favouring doctor and naturopath appointments, supplements, acupuncture and massage treatments over almost anything else in my budget. I did a heck load of research and made it my business to be firmly in the driver’s seat when it came to my health.

Then, in early January? I got my latest round of blood tests back from the doctor. I’m still finding it hard to believe, but check it out…

Thyroid blood test results!!

That’s right, biatches!

Almost all my results are now in the normal range.

Admittedly, my thyroid hormones (T3, T4, TSH) stabilised in mid-2012, as you can see from the August results (which are almost exactly the same as the January results!).

There’s still a little work to do with my TSH levels, but not much! The big change however, is my antibody levels…

THEY ARE ALMOST COMPLETELY NORMAL!

Remembering of course, that antibodies are the horned devils that destroy one’s thyroid gland over time, if left unchecked. So its super-important to have them under control!!

You would not believe the happy dances I’ve been doing since I got these results!

Of course, this doesn’t mean I can entirely relax. An autoimmune disorder is a life-long thing, and I’ll always need to monitor my health to make sure I don’t slip backwards.

But I’m now much stronger, have more energy and feel more like myself again than I did for most of last year.

AND MY BLOOD TESTS ARE ALMOST COMPLETELY NORMAL AS IF I WAS NEVER SICK.

*WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*

What helped me get to this point, you ask?

  • Last November I quit sugar, and since then I’ve lost over 12kg (26 pounds) where for the last few years I haven’t been able to lose any weight at all (a wonderful Hashimoto’s symptom!). AND this was achieved without starving myself or exercising excessively, either. These days, I rarely crave anything sweet and when I do, I can satisfy that urge with non-sugary foods.
  • I quit gluten too. This one was harder, but it was only recently that I realised even having a little bit (like say… eating a croissant!) REALLY affects the quality of my mind (e.g. brain fog vs no brain fog).
  • I completed a couple of medical-grade Metagenics detox programs and every day I take a number of high quality supplements (mostly Metagenics). These have made a huge difference. The next phase is to look at how I can derive what I’m getting from the supplements from my natural food intake.
    Even though this article is about healing from MS, it’s still relevant to what I’m doing. Basically? We can and should be getting all the nutrients we need from our food.
  • Also? I’ve done epic amounts of research on food, the digestive and immune systems and so on. All to learn more about how Hashimoto’s isn’t really a thyroid condition (the thyroid is affected by other system dysfunctions in the body) and that to heal it, you actually have to heal the rest of you first.
  • Especially the digestive system/gut health (aka leaky gut syndrome). Most people in fact, could do with paying more attention to their gut health BEFORE they get sick. My key learning is that most chronic health problems are rooted in digestive health issues!
  • I’ve learned more about what it is to be a Highly Sensitive Person (I’ve read the book, too). Good health, you see, is more than feeling well on a physical level. It’s all about getting to know yourself and discovering your own particular needs in relation to the world. And? HSP’s actually have different biochemistry to non-HSP’s.

Acceptance

The changes wrought by having Acceptance as one of my Two Words are more challenging to quantify.

I’ve written a lot about it, of course. You could say this entire blog is all about the process of self-acceptance!

There’s been a lot of inner work going on, especially during my kinesiology appointments, which I’ve been having every 6-8 weeks all year. The beauty of kinesiology is that the changes it brings, persist. Grow, even. Unfold ever-after.

But what’ve I done this year around acceptance? Especially the self-acceptance kind of acceptance? For me, this is how it’s looked on a daily basis…

It is all about generating self-love, which means stuff like this:

  • Examining my patterns around what kind of love I’m willing to accept.
  • Being real with the idea that I might not get to have kids.
  • I’ve learned that my destiny is to become a healer: knowing who you are and where you’re going is incredibly empowering!
  • Listening closely to what I really need on a physical, emotional and spiritual level.
  • Checking in with myself. If I’ve changed my mind about something, paying attention so I can do what I should be doing instead! Too often, I’ll let things be as they are instead of changing direction to where I should be going.
  • Getting to bed early enough. I’m still a little patchy on this one but hey… I’ll be working on it more this year. More sleep is always required.
  • Eating foods that are nourishing and full of goodness (e.g. organic meat/veg and LOTS of green foods!!). Cooking – more than one friend in recent times has complimented me on my cooking, which consists of very simple but tasty ingredients.
  • Respecting my need for self-expression and being creative, and partaking in creative pursuits as often as I can. Writing. Teaching. Yoga. Singing. Dancing. Yup.
  • Developing healthy personal boundaries. I’m often way too agreeable for my own good, and in the past I’ve let people get away with things that I really shouldn’t. In terms of how they act around and towards me. Not any more, though. This can come across as being disagreeable or unfriendly. But it’s absolutely necessary in order to take care of myself.
  • Developing stronger energetic boundaries, too. I’m yet to work out the day-to-day benefits of being highly empathic (not the same word as empathetic!), which means that without realising it I take on other people’s emotional states/feelings and even physical pain. But I’m getting much better at noticing this now, and I’m working on patching up my energy field.

My teacher likes to say that you can’t save anyone else until you can save yourself. Since I’m fond of metaphors, this is like saying there’s no point in saving people from a sinking ship if you’ve got leaks in your own hull.

I think like most people, my self-acceptance work is ongoing. But the key is to have self-acceptance as part of your make up in the first place. As long as you keep paying attention to it (sub-consciously or not), you’re gonna be doing yourself and other people a good turn.

~ Svasti

-37.814251 144.963169

Throwing spaghetti at the wall

15 Wednesday Jun 2011

Posted by Svasti in Health & healing, Hypothyroidism

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

autoimmune, carbohydrates, dark night of the soul, dis-ease, gluten, Hashimoto’s, hypothyroidism, Kinesiology, metabolism, PTSD, spaghetti, sugar, throwing spaghetti at the wall, thyroid

Being a poetical type, I like to think of this as the twilight time of my thyroid diagnosis. There’s a little bit of light being cast by the moon, but it is kinda hard to see on account of the growing darkness (it’s always darkest before dawn, natch).

I could go on with the clichés – dark night of the soul and all that. But hey, I’ve had several of those already and they no longer freak me out…

But I reckon it fits: this is the twilight time, the settling dusk. While I do know what’s coming (sort of), it’s gonna be a while before sunrise makes an appearance.

Saw the doctor this morning for my blood test results and yessum, I hit the hypothyroid jackpot – Hashimoto’s – which is the autoimmune version of this dis-ease.

But then apparently, most people diagnosed with hypothyroidism will have Hashimoto’s. For whatever reason, that’s just how it is.

My naturopathic-MD friend, the one who described thyroid problems an epidemic? She wasn’t wrong. At least two of my friends also have the same condition. Another friend possibly does, but she hasn’t had the tests to confirm it yet. I had a lovely Skype chat with one of these friends on the weekend. It’s good to have some love and support from someone who’s been through it all.

Right now there’s a lot to digest. And hey, I get that this isn’t cancer (at least, probably not!) but it IS a life-long illness that requires constant monitoring and careful caring for my physical, mental and emotional well-being. Which is the sort of stuff we should all be doing for ourselves anyway, and yet most of us don’t. Until we have to, which is the boat I now find myself in along with millions of others.

Where to begin? Currently, this is where I’m at…

I’ve been taking hormone tablets for a month now. I’m quite ambivalent about that, being more into natural/alternative therapies and I honestly haven’t noticed that much difference since I started them. On the other hand, I did notice a significant difference when I began my epic consumption of vitamins/minerals/amino acids.

Symptom-wise, my energy is still up and down like a yo-yo. I need LOTS of sleep and always wake up tired. Even though I need sleep, I sometimes find it hard to stay asleep for a full eight hours. If I have a busy weekend or if I’m out after work a couple of nights in a row, the next night MUST be a rest night. It’s like a car running out of petrol – I simply stop. My monthly cycle still makes me feel like I’m about to die (no exaggeration). And of course, I am still not losing weight, no matter how well I eat and take care of myself.

I didn’t even really know what to ask my doctor today, despite all the reading I’ve done in the last month. I mentioned some of the research and information I’ve discovered, but it seemed like I had to prompt her to tell me anything useful.

Apparently cutting dairy is recommended in addition to sugar and gluten – these food stuffs are considered toxic for people with Hashimoto’s (lately, I’ve begun noticing my distaste for sugary anything). I also need to be careful with my consumption of carbohydrates (which are basically sugar). All of which – with the exclusion of gluten – is stuff people do to lose weight.

Someone even commented on Twitter that as a result of these changes, I’ll be skinny. BUT. But. This isn’t necessarily the case, because the thyroid is intimately involved with the metabolism, and my thyroid is faulty. It’s going to take time and a fair bit of trial and error to figure this all out and it still doesn’t mean I’ll be “skinny” when I do.

{Confession: there’s still a part of me that hopes my Hashimoto’s isn’t “that bad”. Which is disturbingly similar to how I viewed the beginning of my (undiagnosed at the time) slide into PTSD-land. Luckily I know better now.}

However in some ways this is true: currently I only have a mild level of autoimmune antibodies – which can easily become worse without appropriate treatment. My situation is complicated because I’m also ridiculously deficient in iron, B12, and vitamin D. So my doctor thinks it’ll be six months or so before we’ve got a better view of what’s going on.

I think I get it though – she’s trying not to overwhelm me with a billion pieces of information. She wants me to make small step-changes, bit by bit. But it’s hard, because I don’t want it to take so long and I like to know everything up front.

Next up for me is to get an ultrasound for my thyroid (there’s such a thing as thyroid cancer that needs to be ruled out), and see an endocrinologist who specialises in thyroid disorders.

I’ve got a referral, a bunch of test print outs and two extra supplements to take (selenium and Activated B6). I have another referral too; for a kinesiologist who has herself had thyroid issues. Also on my team is my acupuncturist.

There are other specialists that I’m getting in touch with as well… but my budget can only take so much at any one time!

So I guess this is throw the (gluten free) spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks time. I don’t know what will work yet and until I do, I’m gonna keep throwing spaghetti, if y’know what I mean…

~ Svasti

-37.814251 144.963169
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  • My father’s been slowly dying for almost a year now
  • It’s all about my brother
  • The work continues
  • In case you missed it…
  • Two Words Project: 2012 summary
  • Looking both ways
  • A forked road
  • Who am I becoming?

Guest posts by me on other blogs

  • Yoga with Nadine: 5 Key Tips for Healing From Trauma
  • The Joy of Yoga: Guest post from Svasti
  • Suburban Yogini: My yoga story
  • BlissChick: EmBody Talk: Svasti, Yogini & Survivor
  • CityGirl Lifestyle: A Pearl of Wisdom {by Svasti}
  • Linda's Yoga Journey: I don't know how old yoga is and neither do you - part 1
  • And part 2
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