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Svasti: A Journey From Assault To Wholeness

~ Recovery from PTSD & depression + yoga, silliness & poetry…

Svasti: A Journey From Assault To Wholeness

Tag Archives: illumination

Happy Diwali

06 Saturday Nov 2010

Posted by Svasti in Spirituality, Yoga

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Tags

Community, Diwali, Essence Nature, Festival, illumination, inner battles, kirtan, lights, mediation, Rama, Ramayana, rangoli, Ravana, Sita, Swami Satyananda

Image from Free Greeting Cards: http://is.gd/gLDVe

Heading out in a little while to a Diwali celebration at a friend’s place – someone I met through the various kirtan groups I’ve been hanging out with.

Diwali translates as “row of lights” and it’s a beautiful tradition. Basically, it’s about bringing people together and sharing food, activities and fun. Many lamps are lit to create a beautiful illumination over the five days of Diwali.

Diwali also ties into the Ramayana, as a celebration of Rama and Sita returning from Sri Lanka after Rama (and Hanuman) defeated the demon Ravana. So your basic triumph of “good” over “evil” or light over dark. I always like to consider these sorts of stories as inner work: we all have our demons, our inner hero and that part of us that needs to be protected. And when we accomplish a triumph or two over the “darkness”, or those things that would pull us down and away from our essence nature, there is a sense of illumination – hence all the lamps.

He who Himself sees all but whom no one beholds, who illumines the intellect, the sun, the moon and the stars and the whole universe but whom they cannot illumine, He indeed is Brahman, He is the inner Self. Celebrate the real Deepavali by living in Brahman, and enjoy the eternal bliss of the soul.

The sun does not shine there, nor do the moon and the stars, nor do lightnings shine and much less fire. All the lights of the world cannot be compared even to a ray of the inner light of the Self. Merge yourself in this light of lights and enjoy the supreme Deepavali.
~Swami Satyananda

And hey – this year has been full to overflowing with my own inner battles. In fact, life’s kind of been like that for the last five years! So I’m very much looking forward to this evening of honouring the light in myself and other people.

So what does a private Diwali celebration look like in Australia? Well, first of all, our hostess is originally from India, so it will be a hybrid Indian/Australian festival. We will make rangoli, get our kirtan and mediation on and later, eat together. I’m contributing some Indian desserts and organic wine, and a whole mass of tea lights.

And I hope that you take a moment to reflect and appreciate all that you’ve achieved this year. All the demons you’ve battled and defeated, and remember that all of us are none other than Essence Nature.

Even the “demons” we encounter – they are too, are just working through their own perceptions of this life.

Om Shanti!!

~Svasti

-37.814251 144.963169

Illumination

09 Thursday Jul 2009

Posted by Svasti in Learnings, Spirituality

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

clarity, full moon, Guru, Guru Purnima, illumination, initiation, kickboxing, kula, Muay Thai, sadhana, Samskaras, Yoga, yogi, Yogini

Clarity can come at the strangest moments. And the volume or quality of such a moment is hard to qualify – once it hits, it doesn’t fade, but damn, it can happen so fast!

The light of such clarity reaches into every corner of your being. Things that were complex and confusing become simple and 100% crystal clear.

Just as an aside, although it’s related… in my experience there’s a few rather disconcerting things that occur if you’ve found your Guru and have taken formal initiation (if you’re that way inclined).

For one thing, you become part of a collective energy body, connected, even if you’re on the other side of the world. And that means all kinds of weird and wonderful things. I could tell you about it, but you’d just think I was taking LSD or something!

I mention this because of the recent full moon, which also happened to be Guru Purnima – a traditional yearly festival where initiates pay homage to their Guru – and to the Guru lineage in general, actually.

Jaya Hanuman! Jaya Gurudev!!

Right now, some of my kula are hanging out in Thailand together, celebrating this event with our Guru. I was of course, there for the festivities last year. Sigh!

Whenever there’s a large gathering of my kula somewhere in the world, if I’m not there, I feel it anyway.

I get ‘zapped’ by the energy being generated. Others do, too. Often, I can’t sleep, which also happens for many of us in the lead up to any intensive retreat we’re about to attend.

Two nights ago I had the worst sleep I’ve had in absolutely ages. Woke up and realised, oh yeah… full moon… Guru Purnima!!

It’s always a very powerful time of year.

Though it wasn’t just me and my kula. A lot of people were reporting (via Twitter) this particular full moon was affecting them intensely.

Even though I felt awful when I woke up Tuesday morning, I also felt renewed. Almost like… a lot of ‘stuff’ had just been clawed away.

And I was clear – it’s time to stop leaking energy all over the place.

When doing sadhana over time, practitioners build up a lot of energy. It can be quite a heady experience, especially if you’re not ready to deal with it.

Often what happens to inexperienced yogis (definitely happened/s to me) is that you’re a bit like a sieve, full of leaks through which you lose much of the energy you’ve generated. Kind of like that hole in the pot.

Those leaks aren’t easy to control initially. There’s guidelines you can follow, to help you reduce and eventually stop any such leakages. But, there’s usually a few weaknesses (habits/samskaras) that are harder to stop than others.

And so you keep haemorrhaging energy until you can give them up.

Upon waking after my very rough four hours of sleep, post full moon/Guru Purnima, things were perfectly clear.

Illuminated, you could say.

Time to put away my emotional hooks and hang ups as much as possible. I know what they are – I crave feeling connected to others. I fear rejection because it’s been a theme in my life. I hate feeling alone because I’ve been alone much of my life. So I try to forge connections where perhaps there aren’t any. I seek kindred spirits, perhaps a little too intensely.

And its time to stop. No more allowing myself to carry dead weight – mine or anyone else’s. No holding on to people or things or ideas for the sake of it, hoping for change that never comes. Just… no more of that!!

Whatever happened this last full moon, I feel like I’ve been given a wakeup call. A very loud and clear surge of clarity and self respect!

Now, I feel like I’m rebuilding my yoga practice from the ground up. Starting with the vessels containing all the good health and energy I generate – my physical and emotional bodies.

So I’ve hauled myself into the dockyard for renovations, and not just a patch up job!

Time for me to start taking names (mine!) and kicking some ass (again, mine!).

Fittingly I’m also starting Muay Thai (kickboxing) again for the first time in over five years (a nice counterbalance to the stillness).

Its way past time for the fighter in me to come out and get rid of everything standing in the way of becoming physically, mentally and emotionally healthy.

Rock on!

~Svasti

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