Carried by a Promise discussion [1]

Tags

Carried by a Promise, Diary of a Woman's Search, kula, Paramahansa Satyananda, Reviews, spiritual seekers, Swami Radha, Swami Radhananda, Swami Sivananda, Yoga

This month I’ll be writing a number of posts about the book: Carried by a Promise by Swami Radhananda. I’m fortunate enough to have been offered a review copy, and right now I’m about four paragraphs in and enjoying it immensely.

For me there’s a personal connection to this story, even if it’s several times removed. Swami Radhananda’s guru is Swami Radha, and her guru is Swami Sivananda. Another student of Swami Sivananda was Paramahansa Satyananda, who is my guru’s guru. So we are of the same root lineage.

Additionally, I’ve always felt very connected to Swami Sivananda through reading books by and about him and through his photos.

This was the first photo of Swami Sivananda I ever saw on a wall at my guru’s house when he lived in Australia:

It’s hard to explain, but I feel that I know him even though he died before I was born. Then when I first read Swami Radha’s book [Diary of a Woman’s Search], I found it very compelling – in part due to her relationship to Swami Sivananda and also because I had an intense healing experience mid-read, lying on my couch in a tiny apartment in Melbourne.

I’ve re-read Swami Radha’s book many times, always gaining some new insight I could relate to. I’ve since given it to someone else that I felt really needed it, but I’ll buy it again some day as it’s one of those books that lives in my heart.

Given all the above, Swami Radhananda’s story is of great interest to me. Once again we have the story of a western woman on an intense spiritual journey – and there really aren’t enough of these stories – which is odd when you consider that the western-world yoga scene is primarily dominated by women.

For much of 2010 the yoga blogosphere was on fire about what “real” yoga is, who’s doing it and who isn’t, the uber-commercialisation of yoga as a brand and so on. In stark contrast, what Swami Radha and Swami Radhananda are writing about are very personal and real stories about their yoga practice. About the transformation of their lives through yoga – and we’re not just talking about who can do what poses.

So far from what I’ve read of Carried by a Promise, it is rich in honesty and self-reflection. I am impressed by the number of questions Swami Radhananda managed to come up with as she struggled with her burgeoning spiritual life at the same time as her marriage was disintegrating, while she worked to raise her kids and pay a mortgage without an income from her husband.

My first impressions are that she was both vulnerable and fierce in the pursuit of her studies. Her words are like honey, and they remind me of everything that’s happened in my own life since I first met my guru in 1998. I feel like I’m reading the diary of someone I know and it invokes that same sense of “home” I get when among my kula and with my guru.

Suffice to say I am looking forward to wading in deeper!

So hang tight, and I’ll be posting my reflections from the book in the next little while. In the meantime you might enjoy checking out Swami Radhananda’s website, which includes video clips of her reading parts of the book.

Finally, you can read a review by Roseanne at It’s all yoga, baby – she’s already read the book and her account has me very excited and curious!

~Svasti

Book review: My Story by Dave Pelzer

Tags

Abuse, Assault, Child Abuse, Dave Pelzer, Recovery, Reviews, Starvation

I’m really freakin’ cranky today. I’ve had this cold for the past week and now I’m losing my patience.

My voice sounds like fingernails against chalkboard (when you can actually hear it), my left ear has blocked up and my hacking coughs produce either large wads of gooey phlegm or hard, nasty pieces that were probably once caked on to the inside of my lungs.

So I’m not feeling that well. I’ve been gargling, cleansing my sinuses (thanks neti pot!) and drinking enormous amounts of fluids and I’m sloooowly getting better. Grrr.

Anyhow, I digress. I’m taking a leaf out of Shiv’s blog and posting a book review. Not that I plan to make a habit of it, its just that this particular book really affected me.

The book is actually an amalgam of three books into one larger one. “My Story” by Dave Pelzer is a heartbreakingly painful story of a derranged, alcoholic mother who singles out one of her sons – Dave – for outrageously cruel and almost fatal treatment from the ages of around five to twelve, when he was finally made a ward of the state.

The first book (A Child Called It) details his life of pain, suffering, humiliation and degredation by his mother. She starved him and beat him. She made him sleep in the garage and work as a slave for the rest of the family. She burned him arm and would feed him ammonia. And much more. Dave’s father stood by helplessly wishing he could help. All the while, this small boy tried to understand what he’d done to deserve this treatment and why his mummy didn’t love him. Reading this story made me cry often and when his teachers and school nurse finally took action to take him away from his mother my relief was palpable.

The second book (The Lost Boy) looks at Dave’s time in foster care and trying to adjust to living a relatively normal life after years of torture and seclusion. It wasn’t easy for him or for his foster parents and even though he was away from his mother, she still did what she could to ruin his life further. Its a very interesting look at the inside world of foster homes in 1970’s America. Its also fascinating to read of Dave’s tactics for survival in a world he didn’t know how to relate to.

The final book (A Man Named Dave) details his rise from the ashes of his childhood life. Dave joins the airforce and becomes sucessful in the world. But ofcourse, he still has 1,001 demons and issues to deal with. What’s admirable about Dave, is that he goes after it all. He might hurt, he might not understand – but he never gives up, never stops trying. Dave also eventually falls in love and finds meaning through his relationship with his son. And somehow, he manages to find it in his heart to forgive his mother.

Dave’s recovery and deep-filled desire to help other “at-risk” children is awe-inspiring.

Whilst reading this book at this time in my life was a little bit… dicey for my internal emotional world, I couldn’t stop reading it. It was literally a page-turner of the best kind, despite the horrific content.

I’m still not sure where I’m at right now, given the weight of the book. But am I supremely glad I read it. He’s just another example of the kind of person we can all choose to be – someone who rises high above the past and strides with purpose and strength into a much brighter future.

~Svasti